sissy boys and tom boys.

Curious, isn't it, the troubles that arise from Gender assumptions? Male, female; masucline, feminine; gay, straight; manly, girly; strong, emotional; aggressive, nurturing.....you get the idea. Where did these roles come from? Obviously, there are usually physiological cues to help us determine our gender, but where do these sort of assigned attributes come from? And how many people do we know that really fit them? What does the Bible say?


I think any girl (and guy for that matter) can attest to the fact that the John Wayne type of guy is an endangered species leaving room for the stay at home dads and metro-sexuals. I'm not degrading this, sometimes a circumstance will warrant a man to take on more "feminine" roles. Conversely, sometimes circumstance will make mama the bread bearer or leader. Sure, God assigns biblical ROLES to genders on occasion. He calls for wives to be helpers, and husbands to be leaders. Beyond that, this notion that men ought to be stoic, aggressive and non-emotional while women ought to be vulnerable, irrational and nurturing came from us. In my studies I have never found a case in the bible where a woman is instructed not to be strong or authoratative or for a man to refrain from sadness or lack nurturing qualites. In fact, where did we begin to see men and women as OPPOSITES? God doesn't see us that way....


God very clearly states that he created both man and woman in his image. Well, God isn't just a being full of contradictions and opposing qualities is he? So why should we be? God encompasses "masculine" and "feminine" traits....for from him all these traits have derived. Perhaps we each showcase individual attributes of GOD not of boy or girl. 


A lot of Christians tend to hold to the fact that men ought to be stoic and assertive, while women passive and submissive. Woman should be a meek, weak vessel who speaks only when spoken to, never makes the first move, and lives in the kitchen and nursery. Opposingly, man ought to never flinch at pain, shed an emotional tear or lack the ability to make the right decision at all times. Wow, that's a lot of dissappointment for people that don't work that way. Let's look at Proverbs 31:10, the passage specifically about a Godly wife. God explicitly claims her great value, as well as her strength, assertion, business mind, and dignity:



A wife of noble character who can find?
       She is worth far more than rubies.
 ¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
       and lacks nothing of value.
 ¹² She brings him good, not harm,
       all the days of her life.
 ¹³ She selects wool and flax
       and works with eager hands.
 ¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
       bringing her food from afar.
 ¹⁵ She gets up while it is still dark;
       she provides food for her family
       and portions for her servant girls.
 ¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
       out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
 ¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
       her arms are strong for her tasks.
 ¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
       and her lamp does not go out at night.
 ¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
       and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
 ²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
       and extends her hands to the needy.
 ²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
       for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
 ²² She makes coverings for her bed;
       she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
 ²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
       where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
 ²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
       and supplies the merchants with sashes.
 ²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
       she can laugh at the days to come.
 ²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
       and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
 ²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
       and does not eat the bread of idleness.
 ²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
       her husband also, and he praises her:
 ²⁹ "Many women do noble things,
       but you surpass them all."
 ³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
       but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
 ³¹ Give her the reward she has earned,
       and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
Now tell me how it's not biblical that a woman be strong, dignified, and even a fine business mind. She's providing the food, she's obtaining lack of fear, she's also being loving and nurturing as we think she ought to be. she clearly hosts what society would classify as both "masculine" and "feminine" traits.


Conversely, we see that man should never be sad or cry or show fear or weakness. This is equally un-supported in Biblical text. Look at the example Jesus our Lord set- he WEPT (meaning cried) at the death of his friend Lazarus even though he knew he could raise him. He was so afrain before his crucifixion, he sweat blood. Jesus also displayed strength and assertion many times, such as in the temple courtyards when he over turned the tables. God laments over man many times, and is wrathful as well, and therefore posseses "masculine" and "feminine" qualities.


Now, I know not everyone views man or woman as having to ascribe to certain attributes- but a lot of people in the last 100 or so years do. How exactly this originated I can't say- but I can deny that it's true.